Jackson has reached the teething stage, as well as that super fun stage where he is clingy occasionally. He has also developed his first double ear infection! talk about super sad!! He is such a good baby though I never would have guessed that he was sick. I had brought him into the doctor because of a suspected sinus infection. To my surprise, the doctor told me she wasn’t sure if he had a sinus infection or not, but he for sure had a double ear infection. For about two seconds I felt like the worst mom in the world because I hadn’t even noticed. I had only taken him to the doctor because my mom recommended it. (Thank HEAVENS Jackson has a Grandma who cares as much as she does!!)
So I started giving him medicine, constantly checking his temperature, and of course I continued to wipe and suction his little nose. Now, as you have probably guessed, Jackson, just like every other baby out there, HATES having his nose suctioned. I was suctioning his nose and I found myself telling him “I know, I am the worst mom in the world, and I am sorry.” After I finished, while he was playing in the new jumper he got for Christmas, I really started thinking about what I had said. I was not the worst mom in the world for clearing his airway, in most cases that would make me a pretty great mom. I realize that I actually want to be the worst mom in the world if it means that my son is healthy, happy, and snot free on a good day!
I don’t care if my future children complain about being disciplined because that discipline will turn them into children that adults won’t necessarily hate (let’s be honest for a sec, some adults just hate kids no matter what, and it is totally their loss.) The pain and annoyance that kids feel when they are disciplined is nothing compared to the pain and annoyance they will feel as adults if I as a parent don’t teach them when they are young. So I have decided I want to be the worst mom in the world.
What is so funny to me about how this all finally dawned on me, is that I took my dog to the vet and asked him some questions about behavior, and he flat out told me that I needed to give my dog, Milo, more discipline. He told me that while Milo would hate it in the moment, he would get over it, and still love me. And my kids will be the same way, even my five month old who totally hates it when I wipe the snot off of his little nose.